Making Better Life Decisions with Life Decision Records
Architecture Decision Records (ADRs) help software teams document technical choices systematically. Teams use ADRs to capture the context, evaluate alternatives, and record the reasoning behind major decisions that have long-term consequences.
I recently had to make some major life decisions - whether to accept a job offer or buy my first home - and applying the same structured approach through writing helped me navigate these choices with more clarity and confidence. Here’s how applying that same rigor through writing can improve your major life decisions.
The Limits of Informal Decision-Making
Most of us make major life decisions in the same way. We think about it, consult friends and family, and create a mental pros and cons list. For life-changing choices like career moves, major purchases or relocations, this informal approach has limitations that can leave us second-guessing ourselves.
The biggest limitation? Without documenting our reasoning, we can’t effectively learn from our decisions. We might remember the outcome, but the specific factors we weighed, the assumptions we made, and our emotional state get fuzzy over time. This makes it harder to recognize patterns - like consistently underestimating certain risks or being overly optimistic about timelines - that could improve future decisions.
How Writing Improves Decision-Making
After applying a structured writing approach to two major personal decisions, I’ve found that writing adds rigor to how we think about complex choices.
- Writing clarifies thinking: We often believe we’ve thoroughly considered a decision when we’ve just had the same circular thoughts repeatedly. Writing forces you to articulate specific reasons, identify trade-offs and acknowledge assumptions you didn’t realize you were making. When there are many factors to consider, writing them down ensures you don’t miss anything important.
- Writing captures your complete reasoning: This includes both logical analysis and your emotional state. Emotions are valuable data points in decision-making, but we don’t want to make important decisions emotionally. By documenting both your analytical reasoning and feelings at the time, you create a complete picture to learn from later.
- Written decisions become sharable artifacts: Instead of just verbally explaining your thought process from memory to others, you can share a structured document that helps organize conversations and gather targeted feedback. You can also use this with AI tools to explore different perspectives, though be careful about uploading sensitive personal information and never delegate the final decision to an AI.
- Writing enables retrospective learning: Six months or two years later, you can revisit your documented reasoning and evaluate the outcome of the decision. Did you consistently make overly optimistic assumptions? Do you have a pattern of underestimating certain types of risks? This retrospective analysis is much harder without a durable record of your original thinking. This helps with making better decisions over time.
The Life Decision Record Template
I was inspired by Architecture Decision Records, which is why I’m calling this a Life Decision Record.
When we make major decisions, we’re often saying yes or no to a significant change - accepting that job offer, buying that house, making that move. For these change vs status quo decisions, here’s a framework that captures the essential elements. Adapt as needed, such as when you also need to decide between multiple choices.
Context: Brief background about the decision, why you’re facing it now and why it is important.
Example: “I’ve been investing in index funds. With rising property prices, I wasn’t sure if this would be a good time to buy my first home.”
Reasons to Say No: What does maintaining the status quo give you? What are the benefits of not making this change?
Example: “I’m not in any rush to buy a house. I can keep investing in index funds. No mortgage stress.”
Reasons to Say Yes: What’s in it for you if you proceed? What opportunities or benefits would you gain?
Example: “Possibility to accelerate my retirement plans, having my own place sooner, more convenient location for shorter commutes, portfolio diversification.”
Information Gaps: What are the known unknowns? What questions do you still need to answer? Fill this in over time but accept that some uncertainty will remain.
Example: “Will property prices continue to rise over time? How long do I have to wait for capital appreciation if I want to sell for profit?”
Risks of Saying No: What could go wrong if you don’t act? What opportunities might you miss? What are the costs of maintaining the status quo?
Example: “Property prices continue rising and I get priced out. Index funds don’t follow the long-term historical trends and don’t perform as well due to structural shifts.”
Risks of Proceeding: What could go wrong if you do act? What new problems or commitments would you take on?
Example: “Buying near property cycle peak - could wait longer than expected to sell. Bank repossession risk if prices drop 40% and I can’t cover negative equity. Retrenchment while servicing mortgage. High interest rates making payments unaffordable.”
Alternatives: Are there other options you haven’t fully considered? Different approaches to the same goal?
Example: “Continue investing in index funds and wait for property cycle to turn.”
Final Decision: I decided to do / not do X because…
Consequences: What happened as a result? How did it work out?
Retrospective: What patterns can you identify in your decision-making for next time?
Conclusion
The next time you’re facing a major life decision, consider documenting your thought process systematically. You don’t need to use every section of this template or follow it rigidly. The goal is developing the habit of structured analysis that you can adapt to your situation.
The most surprising benefit isn’t just better decisions (though that happens too) - it’s the confidence that comes from knowing you’ve thought things through thoroughly. Whether your choice works out or not, you’ll know you made the best decision possible with the information you had.
This is a lot more work, but your future self will thank you for it.